Love and friendship - a personal reflection

 A blog without pictures is boring. Photo taken at Melbourne outskirts.

There was this blogger who wrote stuff that got me thinking a lot about my understanding with regards to relationship and romance. Allow me to paraphrase on the highlights of that blog post:

Males rely on female partner/spouse as their sole emotional support. Bonding between males are usually on a more superficial level that does not being honest about emotional problems. As a result, males need to have a female partner to share their emotional needs and vulnerabilities. On the other hand, females do no fear to share emotional problems. Friendship between females is heavily based on emotional support. Having someone to listen to all your problems and keep you company is equivalent to having a friend.

As a result, there is a disconnect between males and females when interpreting relationship as romance or friendship. Males generally think that only a romantic partner would share their emotion problems with them. However, to quote, "...females do it for their romantic partners and their friends and expect a male friend to do it for them the same a female friend would. This fools the male friend into thinking there must be something romantic there when there is not."

The Other Promise

In the end, I could not achieve my goal
of completing my thesis draft by the 26th of November
All the completed chapters require revision
and those uncompleted parts remained uncompleted
Academic writing seemed so difficult to me
as every statement require fact-checking

Actually, I made a point of going to Melbourne at the end of November
and used that as a reminder for this deadline that I have set for myself
Argh... this is so frustrating...

地下鉄抵抗主義

Hmmn... I guess I haven't spend any time
to reflect on my recent activities
so now I will be doing just that

Standard photoshoot with cosplayer friends in which I made the 2D scene into life.
But I didn't render any of those flame. I merely used existing photo stocks...

Everlasting Transeunt

I haven't done any video gaming as of lately
as I am busy with my thesis-writing
And I believe this will go on until mid-September
Now, as I am deprived of my video game aesthetics
I could only rely on my imagination to fill in that void
But I am sure once I have completed my studies
The outcome will justify the effort that I have put forth

Destiny's Union

I love video games just as much as I like good written stories. But I am greatly amazed by video games because itself is a medium is composed of various elements, such as visual art, writing, spoken dialogues, gameplay, animation cutscenes and music that works in tandem to create an immersive experience for the players. Written stories, particularly novels and short stories leave room for your imagination to recreate the scene being described in the writing, which include the smell, the touch and the feeling of the character. Your imagination of the scene may be limited by the words being written. If the description fall short, then the readers would usually fill in the blank with their imagination. In fact, all good stories encourages the viewers to use their imagination to enhance the storytelling experience. In some cases, the viewers were able to use their imagination to fill in the plot holes!

I'm Going All Out

Sigh, the girls in my office talk so much, I really have to put on my noise-cancelling earphones so that I can concentrate on my work or my (manga) reading. Sometimes, I wonder if they come university on their research or do they come here to socialize. Holy cow, it's been half an hour since then and they are still chatting!

Well, I am going all out. I plan to finish my lab work by end of July and start my pilot plant testing next month. Not gonna give too much attention to them,  but it's not like I can totally ignore them.

To the Future that Awaits Ahead

To be honest, I find that my time spent at ACG events was rather wasteful. After all, whenever I go to events, I hardly take any photos anymore. There are more cosplayers at events, but there are less people doing cosplays from the series that I like. Furthermore, the viewcount on the photos that I have taken and uploaded onto my blogs are ridiculously low.

Even if I were to cosplay, there are no longer anyone who would hangout with me. Just like yesterday, besides my best friend who came to the event with me, most of my other friends from the ACG community did not have the time to have a proper chat with me. In recent times, it was my intention to come to these ACG events to socialize. But regretably, I never achieve my goal. As such, I started to feel that coming to these events is quite a waste of my time.

Perhaps I could no longer relate to the happenings in the ever-changing ACG community and my peers as well. And I truly wonder what can I do to overcome this obstacle. I am totally clueless about any possible solution besides spending my time on other hobbies.

In Circles

Have you ever heard of the video game Transistor?
A friend of mine recommended the game to me,
knowing that I like good game music.
And so I started playing the video game many years ago
But I was never motivated to finish the game
Because most of the game setting was unclear to me
and there was no log or journal to keep track of the characters.
But finally, I had the motivation to complete the game yesterday.

Blue and White Porcelain 青花瓷

Recently, I have been looking for motivation to improve my vocational skills. In the past, I have never find such a need because I have been relying on my own desire for "self-actualization", which is the fulfillment of an individual's potential according to Abraham Maslow. However, through the passage of time, my desire for self-actualization is no longer sufficient because that desire had been slowly replaced by a feeling of content.

Teller of World

Of the books that I like to read, they can be separated into 2 categories.

The first category are stories that make me wonder how the world works. Books of this category are often non-fictional works that depicts the observant eye of the writer about human societies and civilizations. It may also include the plight of the underprivileged people to strive for a better future. This kind of books help me to understand the nature of human behaviour, emotion and relationship, which seemed to be rather remote to me who can be inept socially. However, to me, these books are rather taxing to read because it takes some thinking to comprehend the text and the lesson it tries to bring forward. At times, cross-referencing may also be needed to compare and verify any theories or facts in these books.

If I am not in the mood for such heavy reading, then I would rather pick up some other book for a lighter read. Such books form the second category of books in my classification. Books for my light reading are often fictional works that is set in some sort of fantasy setting. Most of the times, these works feature characters that are not closely related to my daily life, such as the Hobbits from Lord of the Ring franchise, or the adventures of Robert Langdon as written by Dan Brown. While the fictional works may also be placed in the modern setting, these works are usually thriller works which focuses on a fast-paced, action-packed plot rather than the intricate relationship and interactions between humans.

Blasphemer

It is definitely a great display of the the power of the law, where someone as high ranking as the sitting governor of Jakarta, Indonesia can be taken to prison. The law has been upheld by the judiciary and relevant enforcement bodies. This may be good for Indonesia, seeing that bribery and other "petty" crimes have become part-and-parcel of the daily lives of most Indonesians.

However, what is worrisome is this could become a landmark rulling, where non-Muslims are at risk of being prosecuted and sent to prison simply for discussing Islam in any way other than prescribed by the Indonesian Ulama Council. Honestly, I do not think these political and religious differences should be a divider of citizen unity. If one could not tolerate, accept or celebrate such differences, where can there be Unity in Diversity? There is no need to send someone into prison for two years under the crime of blasphemy.

Quoting from a discussion thread, "Indonesia along with Turkey, Malaysia, and other countries were once known as secular states. The world was led to believe that while Islam was the state religion, its treatment of all its citizens would be equal, regardless of religion. This is no longer the case as each of these states has taken the dictatorial route, where the line between politics and religion has slowly but surely disappeared".

In my own country, only the "liberal Muslims" are allowed to criticize the various activities done in the name of Islam while getting ostracized in the process. But should people who speak their mind be prosecuted? I do think every adult could think and reject any falsehood on their own. For instance, when Ahok lost the election, it is a clear sign that Ahok's administration is not appreciated by the people of Jakarta. Democracy gave its citizen a way to show their support for their leaders, though it does not entirely show the capability and integrity of the said leaders. As such, there is no need for such a conviction against Ahok.

Just my personal opinion.

Moonwisher

Yay, time to go for another photoshoot
Hopefully this time the stars will be visible
and I will get better photos
compared to my previous trip to Semenyih Dam
My friend also took the liberty to study
about the weather, moon phase and light pollution
so hopefully both of us will get better photos this time around

For now, allow me to post
a photo that was taken on last week

Soul Phrase

When I first started paying attention at ACG characters, I have always looked at male characters who were short or child-like. That was approximately 10 years ago. Some of the characters that caught my interest at that time include Harry Potter, Yellow (Pokemon Adventure), Edward Elric (Fullmetal Alchemist) and Ruronin Kenshin (Samurai X).

My interest to cosplay short male characters was probably because I used to be a short boy during secondary school. During my first year of secondary education (7th grade), I am the shortest boy in class. I still remember my parents and grandparents were so worried that I would stay short for the rest of my life. Alas, I was constantly forced to drink traditional supplements such as old groundnut root soup which was believed to be able to improve height growth. During that period, I actually resigned myself to the fate of being a short person for the rest of my life. Likewise, I started to look up at fictional male characters that happened to be not tall. Perhaps I was just finding a role model, fictional or real, to guide me in the challenges I will face in the future for being short.

Heroes and Heroines- Characters' Medley

With only 5 more weeks before my maiden orchestra concert
I cannot help but to get excited about the event
It's been a very long time since I was charmed
by the fascinating music of Kingdom Hearts franchise
where I got to know the existence of the goddess, Shimomura Yoko

The Solvent of Life

It's been 6 days since I have started my work at the sewage treatment plant (STP) in the state of Kedah. Overall, the work that I have to do is really exhausting that I regret signing up for this in the first place. But I guess I need to keep to my words and complete the task as I have volunteered to do so in the first place - to carry out measurement of various water quality parameters at one-hour intervals for 24-hours, twice in a week's time.

Even before this task is being carried out, I was given a very short notice of the actual date to do this task. In fact, I only received confirmation to go to the site two days before the actual date. Upon receiving confirmation, I quickly book the flight tickets, borrow the equipment and depart to the study site - a STP with an advanced treatment technology.

So far, I have survived a 24-hour ordeal and I am living through another 24-hour challenge at the time of writing. It was truly tormenting both mentally and physically to stay awake and carry on with my tasks. But somehow, Gaia decides to sympathize with my plight and showed mercy in various ways: there was always an overcast sky to shelter me from the deadly sun laser and the pretty starlit-sky provides a temporal distraction from my fatigue.

As I am on an island, I thought it would be apt to be reading books about the sea. "My Old Man and the Sea" is the current book that I am reading, which records in detail the journey of a father-son pair as they sail around Cape Horn in a 25-foot boat powered by the winds and waves.

Final Fiction

There are two game plots that I would be referring in the upcoming write-up, namely Bravely Default: Flying Fairy (BDFF) and its sequel, Bravely Second: End Layer (BSEL).

Remaining Glow

 

It's kinda scary that I have live much of my life in solitude and I find great comfort in that solitude. As a result, I find it really hard to let anyone into my world. It's not that I do not have good friends and companions to share my life, but I do think that my introvert behaviour and my love for solitude are too extreme. Every now and then, I find it difficult to socialize with others, particular with new people, fundamentally due to my poor ability to comprehend and empathize others.

Looking back, the consequences of such introverted behaviours are far-reaching: Day-after-day, I continue to be consummated by my hobbies in solitude.

How did this happened? Was it a self-defense mechanism from emotional suffering? Perhaps over-indulgence in my hobbies? Or could it be a case of social ineptness? The answers remained unknown to me.

Anyhow, this reflection blog post was written as a respond to a failed Amagami challenge (link).

Song of Mana

wizard
· n.
1 a man age 30 years and above with no experience in romance.

monk
· n.
1 a man living under the vow of chasity