How Much?

This is actually the weirdest song that I can relate to the events that happen in the past 36hours. It's kinda like a strange dream. So surreal.

17th of December, 2008. 1200 hour

I was at home at that time and I was pressurized to check my SAM results online. Technically, I believe that there's no point to do so. You still do not have the certificate required to enter a degree course in hand and would still need to go down to the college campus to get it. So I chose to get my grade report cum SACE document the very next day. But my friends have been pestering me for the digits that would ultimately determine our future and I continue to "shake them off".

At night, we went to watch a movie, Yes Man, in a nearby cinema. Among the company was a friend who also took SAM but at Taylor College. He've checked his results and was eager to know mine. He even volunteered to check it for me via WAP cum handphone internet. Another friend said that we could use his N82 to go online via Wi-Fi and check the results when we want. Oh great. Mobile phones can really be a tool of destruction at time. But I stubbornly refused them and we went for the movie right after our chat at a mamak shop.

18th of December, 2008. 0900 hour

I woke up to a call. It was my friend TC who asked whether I was going to get my grade report already. Apparently he got his and left the institution already before I reached the place at 1100 hour. Deng, I missed an appointment. I'm really sorry, pal.

It was 0100hour after the movies. My second late-night movie session, the first one in Genting. We went to KL to just take a spin. Yea, we spent precious car fuel travelling about KL to kill time. I felt asleep in my pal's car while they were chatting about our secondary school life. Heck I don't even want to remember those days when my head was close to bald and I lived in a Chinese-orientated school environment, which I've fearfully deal with in INTI Nilai. And it was this reason, spending the night in a car that made me late for my appointment.

There, I've met my neighbours: Cheng and Eldwin, January-intake students such as Ruby and Yi Wen. I do felt sad that I've not met any from my class except Rupinder, but she was so mentally occupied that my greeting felt on deaf ears. I did get more information to study after SAM from the Head of Programme(s) and also officers of the University Placement Office. Not knowing what to do after getting my results, I followed the gang to Alamanda, Putrajaya. Ken Loon, my schoolmate and a coursemate met us there in Alamanda. We had bowling, then we watched movie, Yes Man. For the first time in my life, I watched a movie twice in a day, less than 24 hours interval. It was a great movie, but I cannot believe that I really pull the act and watched it twice.

By the end of the day, I suggested to Cheng and Eldwin to stay over at my place. They were planning to overnight in the car and I strongly discourage them as I've tried that and I suffered.
So we had mamak food for dinner (two meals at mamak shop in a row) and then close in for the night. And just a while ago, the pair left for Subang Jaya. I'll surely miss them. (I'm not homosexual, but I'm gay about meeting them in INTI)

Now, I'm troubled by my parents who enquires me regarding my future. Such a pain in the neck.

Oh yea, I did okay for my SAM results, but I did not achieve my aim of getting TER 99. So I guess it's a no-no for studying at Monash University.

Sad.

Euphoric Field

It's an important day for many of us SAM students because the results are out today! I've been told that many of my classmates got TER 90 and above. I've bet they must be pretty satisfied with their results. Me? I can't bear to look at my results online but I'd rather see them printed in black and white. Typical me. So I guess I'll go down to Nilai tomorrow to get my certificate. And maybe I get to chat with the lecturers and counselors.

It's amazing how the digits that appears on this certificate is going to determine where I'm heading next year, aboard or local. Yea, I desperately wanna go overseas to study, but it's a dream that cannot be realized that easily. There are prices to pay to make it come true.

So let's hope that my SAM results will be a bliss. And that goes to everyone who is studying or awaiting their results.

Busy Being Fabulous

Not that I'm a pretty boy whatsoever, but I have somehow grew tired of the endless commotion and complication in my daily life. I don't think such merry urban lifestyle is suited for me. Gotto blame this snail-like internet connection for my mood today. Makes my internet browsing (and manga reading) experience a pain in the ass. And the eyes and neck too.

Let's first talk about the volunteers' briefing for the much anticipated ComicFiesta. I had to say, the organizing committee did quite a bad job in managing us, the volunteers. Not only did they not provide a suitable meeting place (Sunway Pyramid's McDonald is way too crowded for 50 youngsters to have a meeting), but they also did a bad job in giving us details regarding our duties on the event itself. I went and met them for like 45 minutes, then I was good to go. In fact, most of the time I spent waiting for a member of the committee group to attend to us 'security guards'. Yea, I got a pose as the guard dog. And there I was hoping to be able to be closer to the organizing committee or the 'doujins'.

Later that day, I went to Monash University's Open Day. Yeah, it was (suprisingly) crowded. I was glad that I was able to talk to the lecturer but I was also sad because the head of programme was no where around. Yet, on this day only I've came to realize that my choice of course is seriously jeopradize as it is under restructuring, which leads to prefer studying aboard. However, it is not possible financially unless I take many, many study loans, which of course would make a an indebted student even before I started working and buy a house, or a car (makes me feel like I'm being targeted by loan sharks).

Further that day it rained so heavily that I was forced to take shelter in Sunway Pyramid, 15 minutes walk from Monash (under intense heat condition which made me all sweaty and disgust of myself). And my plans to go to the PC Fair was also washed away just like that. So sad. I really wanna go to the PC Fair in KLCC to buy a laptop, except that I don't even have the money to buy one. Grrr... I can't comprehend why others do not face financial problems as severe as mine. At least I do not know anyone that suffers so. I've always thought that I managed my money well and I hate to show everyone or anyone that my wallet is empty, which of course many of my classmates would have seen that before.

Someone did suggest to me to get a part-time job. I'm okay with that, except my fears from my first and last job still haunts me (others can hardly understand). Sob T.T It's a little hard to believe that money can be a HUGE problem for someone borned in the month of May, the horoscope for the stigiest personality.

Triangular (Fight on Stage!)

Now it begins. A fight for knowledge and power. A decision to make. A lifetime to regret.

What course should I uptake? Can I afford it?

Now I'm back at the crossroads again, with my back behind a recent matriculation course. Do you know how long it took me to make up my mind, to choose SAM course out of all the other options available? At least two whole month. Wonder how much hair I've lost due to the stress I was having that time. Still, I can't really say that my interest lays in Environmental Science. Well, after after all the study on environmental chemistry and ecology, I found out that I do concern about Nature, except that I fear my passion would die out fast: I'm a quitter.

The second idea I'm concerned about is ComicFiesta 2008, which will be held next weekend. Hope that it will be a really bash like how I've anticipated to be, though I'm sure it is inferior compare to Anime Festival Asia 2008 in Singapore. I was actually selected to be a volunteer in the event. (in fact, all those who applied was accepted unconditionally) So I do hope that I can witness a new frontier in Malaysia's comic industry. Let's pray for it to be a huge success.

"Money concerns" is one of my friend's motto. Now it will also be mine as I struggle to survive this holidays with no money. Eiks, I still owed Edwin 10 bucks. Do remind me about it. I don't have enough money to fix my mobile phone, which means I cannot upload my photo. You know it's rare for me to have photos on myself. I hate the camera for many unspoken reasons you will never know.

Like always, I'll be at home killing time to reduce further injury to my bleeding wallet. I guess I'll start off by reading Eragon, the first book of the trilogy. I've read the second book and it was totally dissapointing. Yet, I've already purchased the first book. So, there is no point critisizing about it anymore, right?

Happy holidays~! (I'm sure many had already begun enjoying their holiday break last month)

DOGFIGHT

It's been more than 2 weeks since I've last posted. Well, I know I was wrong for not updating. Been killing time doing... practically nothing. That's why I say my life is meaningless. I just dunno what was I doing all this while, these 18 years...

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Firstly, right after the exams, me and my classmates went to Genting Highlands for a 3D2N trip. You could tell that I was forced to go. Come on, a person who has minor acrophobia and has little interest in thrilling rides would have no reasons to go up there, right? But then again, since ALMOST all of the clique was going, so I guess I better go. Peer pressure. The main factor that cause delinquency.

Other than the cable car ride, I cannot seem to justify why was I here. Seriously I was dead bored. Imagine how boring was I that I was walking and exploring the place at 4am in the morning. Furthermore, I spent at least 8 hours of solitude, walking all alone even though there was 12 of us in Genting.

Oh yea, for the very first time, I actually ate without paying. Although Genting Cooperation maybe extremely rich, but I feel a little guilty for sneaking into the dining area without paying. Xp

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Oh yea, I went to PD last week. Well, the seawater looked less polluted as compared to the past. But there was something that happened which I think I should say it out loud. You see, my friend caught two fishes from the sea and wanted to bring back home. However, only after half an hour, the fishes have already died and I was asked to throw them out of the car window. Soon after that, we realized that we took the wrong way (old way) and we ended up traveling another 2 hours just to get back to Kajang. I seriously felt afraid... well, mainly because it was dark, I killed two lives and we cannot exactly determine where we were. Luckily we made it back to Kajang in one piece and I managed to attend my friend's b-day party, though I was an hour late. XD
I wanna upload photos on the sea that I loved, the nature that I like to embrace, yet my phone seems to disapprove my action. It doesn't let the computer to read its data. Selfish, isn't it?

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And this wednesday, us SAM student had a barbeque party. The worst part was it rained from 8pm to 12am. So technically we BBQ under the rain. Though it wasn't pleasant at all, but I am sure that it was the best BBQ party I had under the RAIN. =.=
The funny part is that some of our lecturers attended the party, only to get drenched, partially because of the rain, but mostly due to water balloons, I strongly suspect. The scene looked more like a dogfight than a BBQ party. Totally horrible, unbearable. And guess who do all the cleaning up. Me, again. At least this time I'm not alone. My friends (some) did their part too.

Another surprising fact is on how all the participants, both students and lecturers actually behaved on the event, makes me wonder have I really know these people. Gosh, their true colours are just too HORRIFYING for me to bear and watch, so I ended up continue to BBQ in the comfort of my 'safety zone'. Hey, there are even freeloaders that stop in my personal space for protection from the water attack of others, causing me to get wet too :(

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So, off I go rushing my Moral assignments. I really wanna plagarize, but that would totally go against my principle. I bet I would not be able to sleep peacefully if I were to do so. Anyway, now that I've done 2 assignments, I still need to rush another 3. Yet, the due date for all assignments is today. I'm really awed by the fact that we SAM March intake student are extremely good at procastination, particularly delaying our assignments. Xd

Photograph

Whoever invented the (digital) camera is making my life miserable. I hate cameras. There are always there when you don't wanna get recorded for doing something shameful. And it's not available when you want something memorable to be recorded. Photogenic or not, that is another factor to consider when there is an image recorder present.

And so my classmates just kept taking photos after our final public exam paper. Yes, SAM course is officially over (but not for all though). I sure feel relieved now that the exam pressure have disappear. But there is something that intrigues me. Most of us SAM students have not had their lunch and have to bear with their roaring (I really meant roaring) stomachs during the 3 hour and 10 minutes period. Yet, when the exams over, none of them seemed to be hungry anymore. I do guess extreme joy can really ease all sufferings, including empty stomach. Too bad I can never feel the same. Pessimistic me.

Guess now I can do whatsoever I want, but I most probably do what other youths do with their long-term holidays-- rot at home. Yea, I've no idea how I'm gonna spend my holidays. There's this camp that needs facilitators, ComicFiesta2008 in Sunway and also the Genting trip this weekend. There goes my holiday, not to mention the (virtually) piling MPW assignments. No rest, but there's more work. Is this what you call a holiday!?

I'm Yours

After my English exam, I felt as if all of my hopes and dreams have been shattered to pieces and the undertaker is already at the doorstep of my hostel's room. I've just blew up my chances, if there was any in the first place, to get a better exam score. I know that I shouldn't be so materialistic or pessimistic, but in reality, I have really ruin all the opportunities that were given to me, all in one shot. This is just pathetic.

I didn't get the ASEAN scholarship, neither was I offered any other incentives to further study. The world's economy is down and Obama just made the news headlines (what Obama has to do with your degree course?). Either way, I'm now back at the crossroads again, only this time, I do not have any worthy qualifications to boost my chances for a better future. Heck, is this something I should be worried about?

I guess I better off be studying for my Chemistry and Biology paper, right? I must have been thinking a little too far. All the pressure have been driving my up the wall. I gotto stop thinking such nuisance and just focus on my current aim in scoring SAM. Well, I'm better off so.