Now it begins. A fight for knowledge and power. A decision to make. A lifetime to regret.
What course should I uptake? Can I afford it?
Now I'm back at the crossroads again, with my back behind a recent matriculation course. Do you know how long it took me to make up my mind, to choose SAM course out of all the other options available? At least two whole month. Wonder how much hair I've lost due to the stress I was having that time. Still, I can't really say that my interest lays in Environmental Science. Well, after after all the study on environmental chemistry and ecology, I found out that I do concern about Nature, except that I fear my passion would die out fast: I'm a quitter.
The second idea I'm concerned about is ComicFiesta 2008, which will be held next weekend. Hope that it will be a really bash like how I've anticipated to be, though I'm sure it is inferior compare to Anime Festival Asia 2008 in Singapore. I was actually selected to be a volunteer in the event. (in fact, all those who applied was accepted unconditionally) So I do hope that I can witness a new frontier in Malaysia's comic industry. Let's pray for it to be a huge success.
"Money concerns" is one of my friend's motto. Now it will also be mine as I struggle to survive this holidays with no money. Eiks, I still owed Edwin 10 bucks. Do remind me about it. I don't have enough money to fix my mobile phone, which means I cannot upload my photo. You know it's rare for me to have photos on myself. I hate the camera for many unspoken reasons you will never know.
Like always, I'll be at home killing time to reduce further injury to my bleeding wallet. I guess I'll start off by reading Eragon, the first book of the trilogy. I've read the second book and it was totally dissapointing. Yet, I've already purchased the first book. So, there is no point critisizing about it anymore, right?
Happy holidays~! (I'm sure many had already begun enjoying their holiday break last month)
Tuesday, 9 December 2008
Friday, 28 November 2008
DOGFIGHT
It's been more than 2 weeks since I've last posted. Well, I know I was wrong for not updating. Been killing time doing... practically nothing. That's why I say my life is meaningless. I just dunno what was I doing all this while, these 18 years...
******************************************************************
Firstly, right after the exams, me and my classmates went to Genting Highlands for a 3D2N trip. You could tell that I was forced to go. Come on, a person who has minor acrophobia and has little interest in thrilling rides would have no reasons to go up there, right? But then again, since ALMOST all of the clique was going, so I guess I better go. Peer pressure. The main factor that cause delinquency.
Other than the cable car ride, I cannot seem to justify why was I here. Seriously I was dead bored. Imagine how boring was I that I was walking and exploring the place at 4am in the morning. Furthermore, I spent at least 8 hours of solitude, walking all alone even though there was 12 of us in Genting.
Oh yea, for the very first time, I actually ate without paying. Although Genting Cooperation maybe extremely rich, but I feel a little guilty for sneaking into the dining area without paying. Xp
************************************************************
Oh yea, I went to PD last week. Well, the seawater looked less polluted as compared to the past. But there was something that happened which I think I should say it out loud. You see, my friend caught two fishes from the sea and wanted to bring back home. However, only after half an hour, the fishes have already died and I was asked to throw them out of the car window. Soon after that, we realized that we took the wrong way (old way) and we ended up traveling another 2 hours just to get back to Kajang. I seriously felt afraid... well, mainly because it was dark, I killed two lives and we cannot exactly determine where we were. Luckily we made it back to Kajang in one piece and I managed to attend my friend's b-day party, though I was an hour late. XD
I wanna upload photos on the sea that I loved, the nature that I like to embrace, yet my phone seems to disapprove my action. It doesn't let the computer to read its data. Selfish, isn't it?
****************************************************************
And this wednesday, us SAM student had a barbeque party. The worst part was it rained from 8pm to 12am. So technically we BBQ under the rain. Though it wasn't pleasant at all, but I am sure that it was the best BBQ party I had under the RAIN. =.=
The funny part is that some of our lecturers attended the party, only to get drenched, partially because of the rain, but mostly due to water balloons, I strongly suspect. The scene looked more like a dogfight than a BBQ party. Totally horrible, unbearable. And guess who do all the cleaning up. Me, again. At least this time I'm not alone. My friends (some) did their part too.
Another surprising fact is on how all the participants, both students and lecturers actually behaved on the event, makes me wonder have I really know these people. Gosh, their true colours are just too HORRIFYING for me to bear and watch, so I ended up continue to BBQ in the comfort of my 'safety zone'. Hey, there are even freeloaders that stop in my personal space for protection from the water attack of others, causing me to get wet too :(
****************************************************************
So, off I go rushing my Moral assignments. I really wanna plagarize, but that would totally go against my principle. I bet I would not be able to sleep peacefully if I were to do so. Anyway, now that I've done 2 assignments, I still need to rush another 3. Yet, the due date for all assignments is today. I'm really awed by the fact that we SAM March intake student are extremely good at procastination, particularly delaying our assignments. Xd
******************************************************************
Firstly, right after the exams, me and my classmates went to Genting Highlands for a 3D2N trip. You could tell that I was forced to go. Come on, a person who has minor acrophobia and has little interest in thrilling rides would have no reasons to go up there, right? But then again, since ALMOST all of the clique was going, so I guess I better go. Peer pressure. The main factor that cause delinquency.
Other than the cable car ride, I cannot seem to justify why was I here. Seriously I was dead bored. Imagine how boring was I that I was walking and exploring the place at 4am in the morning. Furthermore, I spent at least 8 hours of solitude, walking all alone even though there was 12 of us in Genting.
Oh yea, for the very first time, I actually ate without paying. Although Genting Cooperation maybe extremely rich, but I feel a little guilty for sneaking into the dining area without paying. Xp
************************************************************
Oh yea, I went to PD last week. Well, the seawater looked less polluted as compared to the past. But there was something that happened which I think I should say it out loud. You see, my friend caught two fishes from the sea and wanted to bring back home. However, only after half an hour, the fishes have already died and I was asked to throw them out of the car window. Soon after that, we realized that we took the wrong way (old way) and we ended up traveling another 2 hours just to get back to Kajang. I seriously felt afraid... well, mainly because it was dark, I killed two lives and we cannot exactly determine where we were. Luckily we made it back to Kajang in one piece and I managed to attend my friend's b-day party, though I was an hour late. XD
I wanna upload photos on the sea that I loved, the nature that I like to embrace, yet my phone seems to disapprove my action. It doesn't let the computer to read its data. Selfish, isn't it?
****************************************************************
And this wednesday, us SAM student had a barbeque party. The worst part was it rained from 8pm to 12am. So technically we BBQ under the rain. Though it wasn't pleasant at all, but I am sure that it was the best BBQ party I had under the RAIN. =.=
The funny part is that some of our lecturers attended the party, only to get drenched, partially because of the rain, but mostly due to water balloons, I strongly suspect. The scene looked more like a dogfight than a BBQ party. Totally horrible, unbearable. And guess who do all the cleaning up. Me, again. At least this time I'm not alone. My friends (some) did their part too.
Another surprising fact is on how all the participants, both students and lecturers actually behaved on the event, makes me wonder have I really know these people. Gosh, their true colours are just too HORRIFYING for me to bear and watch, so I ended up continue to BBQ in the comfort of my 'safety zone'. Hey, there are even freeloaders that stop in my personal space for protection from the water attack of others, causing me to get wet too :(
****************************************************************
So, off I go rushing my Moral assignments. I really wanna plagarize, but that would totally go against my principle. I bet I would not be able to sleep peacefully if I were to do so. Anyway, now that I've done 2 assignments, I still need to rush another 3. Yet, the due date for all assignments is today. I'm really awed by the fact that we SAM March intake student are extremely good at procastination, particularly delaying our assignments. Xd
Wednesday, 12 November 2008
Photograph
Whoever invented the (digital) camera is making my life miserable. I hate cameras. There are always there when you don't wanna get recorded for doing something shameful. And it's not available when you want something memorable to be recorded. Photogenic or not, that is another factor to consider when there is an image recorder present.
And so my classmates just kept taking photos after our final public exam paper. Yes, SAM course is officially over (but not for all though). I sure feel relieved now that the exam pressure have disappear. But there is something that intrigues me. Most of us SAM students have not had their lunch and have to bear with their roaring (I really meant roaring) stomachs during the 3 hour and 10 minutes period. Yet, when the exams over, none of them seemed to be hungry anymore. I do guess extreme joy can really ease all sufferings, including empty stomach. Too bad I can never feel the same. Pessimistic me.
Guess now I can do whatsoever I want, but I most probably do what other youths do with their long-term holidays-- rot at home. Yea, I've no idea how I'm gonna spend my holidays. There's this camp that needs facilitators, ComicFiesta2008 in Sunway and also the Genting trip this weekend. There goes my holiday, not to mention the (virtually) piling MPW assignments. No rest, but there's more work. Is this what you call a holiday!?
And so my classmates just kept taking photos after our final public exam paper. Yes, SAM course is officially over (but not for all though). I sure feel relieved now that the exam pressure have disappear. But there is something that intrigues me. Most of us SAM students have not had their lunch and have to bear with their roaring (I really meant roaring) stomachs during the 3 hour and 10 minutes period. Yet, when the exams over, none of them seemed to be hungry anymore. I do guess extreme joy can really ease all sufferings, including empty stomach. Too bad I can never feel the same. Pessimistic me.
Guess now I can do whatsoever I want, but I most probably do what other youths do with their long-term holidays-- rot at home. Yea, I've no idea how I'm gonna spend my holidays. There's this camp that needs facilitators, ComicFiesta2008 in Sunway and also the Genting trip this weekend. There goes my holiday, not to mention the (virtually) piling MPW assignments. No rest, but there's more work. Is this what you call a holiday!?
Friday, 7 November 2008
I'm Yours
After my English exam, I felt as if all of my hopes and dreams have been shattered to pieces and the undertaker is already at the doorstep of my hostel's room. I've just blew up my chances, if there was any in the first place, to get a better exam score. I know that I shouldn't be so materialistic or pessimistic, but in reality, I have really ruin all the opportunities that were given to me, all in one shot. This is just pathetic.
I didn't get the ASEAN scholarship, neither was I offered any other incentives to further study. The world's economy is down and Obama just made the news headlines (what Obama has to do with your degree course?). Either way, I'm now back at the crossroads again, only this time, I do not have any worthy qualifications to boost my chances for a better future. Heck, is this something I should be worried about?
I guess I better off be studying for my Chemistry and Biology paper, right? I must have been thinking a little too far. All the pressure have been driving my up the wall. I gotto stop thinking such nuisance and just focus on my current aim in scoring SAM. Well, I'm better off so.
I didn't get the ASEAN scholarship, neither was I offered any other incentives to further study. The world's economy is down and Obama just made the news headlines (what Obama has to do with your degree course?). Either way, I'm now back at the crossroads again, only this time, I do not have any worthy qualifications to boost my chances for a better future. Heck, is this something I should be worried about?
I guess I better off be studying for my Chemistry and Biology paper, right? I must have been thinking a little too far. All the pressure have been driving my up the wall. I gotto stop thinking such nuisance and just focus on my current aim in scoring SAM. Well, I'm better off so.
Thursday, 23 October 2008
Hidden Track
Do you guys know that there's only 10 days to the beginning of my public exams, which gonna last approximately 2 weeks. It's been very, very tough on me. I don't usually study... yet peer pressure is driving me up the wall. I can find no peace except in my dreamland. This is just too much for me to bear.
I've learnt the I need to achieve 99% TER to get full scholarship from Monash. Shocking! This adds so much more to the burden I'm having already. Furthermore, a student is required to get s minimum of 90% for each subject to continue enjoying the scholarship. That's just insane. Wonder can I live up to my own expectations?
Everyday, I'll put on my lovely headphones (belonged to my dearest brother) and get on with life. And next week I planned to skip all classes and study in insolation instead. Let's just hope that it would be good choice that I'm making. Wish me luck for my exams. Signing out now.
I've learnt the I need to achieve 99% TER to get full scholarship from Monash. Shocking! This adds so much more to the burden I'm having already. Furthermore, a student is required to get s minimum of 90% for each subject to continue enjoying the scholarship. That's just insane. Wonder can I live up to my own expectations?
Everyday, I'll put on my lovely headphones (belonged to my dearest brother) and get on with life. And next week I planned to skip all classes and study in insolation instead. Let's just hope that it would be good choice that I'm making. Wish me luck for my exams. Signing out now.
Sunday, 5 October 2008
Daybreak's Bell
As I munch down 2 packet of instant noodles this Sunday morning, I can't help but to realize that I never ever live in the present, ie. pay attention to what was happening around me. Maybe I am self-centered ba. My friends were like a few tables away and I didn't realize that we were in the same shop, eating. Lolz.
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The sound of a school bell rang in my mind. Stimulating reminiscence.
T.T somehow I really miss my past life. Sleeping in class, playing video games, more sleeping and hanging out with my friends are all I've done in the past 5 years. Seriously. Yet, I regretted that I never treasured those moment. And now, as I force myself to study, only then I truly understand those blissful days and euphoric moments.
*******************************
Another case of verbal abuse. The last recorded incident was by my moral lecturer. This time it was a security guard on a motorbike. He scolded, "You think you're very smart huh, try to walk pass this gate when you couldn't pass through the 1st one". O.o I was rather shocked. But that being said, I was angry because he wouldn't even listen to my reasoning. I guess what people generally think of Malaysians is true: Malaysians are hard-headed, including me of course XD.
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Code Geass R2 has came to a finale. Epic plot, I would say. Probably it would become as good as Lord of the Ring (heck, these two are not even in the same catagory). Gundam Season 2 premiers today, 5pm in Japan. Awwww... but anyway, I guess I won't be trailing this series, not until the public exams are over. Here's a picture/spoiler that I found online.
My clock's alarm rang. I guess it's back to business. Adios.
*******************************
The sound of a school bell rang in my mind. Stimulating reminiscence.
T.T somehow I really miss my past life. Sleeping in class, playing video games, more sleeping and hanging out with my friends are all I've done in the past 5 years. Seriously. Yet, I regretted that I never treasured those moment. And now, as I force myself to study, only then I truly understand those blissful days and euphoric moments.
*******************************
Another case of verbal abuse. The last recorded incident was by my moral lecturer. This time it was a security guard on a motorbike. He scolded, "You think you're very smart huh, try to walk pass this gate when you couldn't pass through the 1st one". O.o I was rather shocked. But that being said, I was angry because he wouldn't even listen to my reasoning. I guess what people generally think of Malaysians is true: Malaysians are hard-headed, including me of course XD.
******************************
Code Geass R2 has came to a finale. Epic plot, I would say. Probably it would become as good as Lord of the Ring (heck, these two are not even in the same catagory). Gundam Season 2 premiers today, 5pm in Japan. Awwww... but anyway, I guess I won't be trailing this series, not until the public exams are over. Here's a picture/spoiler that I found online.
My clock's alarm rang. I guess it's back to business. Adios.
Wednesday, 1 October 2008
Apologize
I know that I've been neglecting my family and my social responsibilities, but I'm sure it is a better option for a brighter future. Sacrificing a little for the moment is well worth it, at least I think so. So, what I wanna say is, I am sorry, mum and dad, for not spending time with you guys. I know I'm not piety, but I have to study too (in reality, I spend only 2 hours a day flipping the pages of my books). You all have to be proud with me. After all, no one actually seen me study in the past 11 years of mandatory education, right?
Another apology to a good friend of mine, Ivan, for not able to attend your b-day gathering this Saturday. Actually, I was hoping to have it earlier, but I guess I was being selfish and of all, inconsiderate. Just hope that you will understand my sincerity to celebrate your b-day with you. Do have a great time.
Rizal and my lovely neighbours, I am truly sorry for not visiting you all this Raya. Here, I would like to offer my wishes, Happy Raya, to you and every Malaysian who are celebrating too.
Friends in Kajang, I know that I have also been neglecting you all and not contact you all, but I know that you will understand and support me to be more successful in my academics. I ought to get a higher TER (Tertiary Entry Rank) to prove to you all that my hardwork pays off, am I right?
But in the end, the only thing I cannot forgive is myself. After all, I was the one who said I want to come back to college campus to study, yet I spend most of my time...
...sleeping...tired...need rest...
I need my rest. Long day ahead. As the Chinese proverb says, "rest to walk a longer journey". Goodnight.
Another apology to a good friend of mine, Ivan, for not able to attend your b-day gathering this Saturday. Actually, I was hoping to have it earlier, but I guess I was being selfish and of all, inconsiderate. Just hope that you will understand my sincerity to celebrate your b-day with you. Do have a great time.
Rizal and my lovely neighbours, I am truly sorry for not visiting you all this Raya. Here, I would like to offer my wishes, Happy Raya, to you and every Malaysian who are celebrating too.
Friends in Kajang, I know that I have also been neglecting you all and not contact you all, but I know that you will understand and support me to be more successful in my academics. I ought to get a higher TER (Tertiary Entry Rank) to prove to you all that my hardwork pays off, am I right?
But in the end, the only thing I cannot forgive is myself. After all, I was the one who said I want to come back to college campus to study, yet I spend most of my time...
...sleeping...tired...need rest...
I need my rest. Long day ahead. As the Chinese proverb says, "rest to walk a longer journey". Goodnight.
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